Mary Lynn

Meet my mother. I don't think I could have asked for a better mother. My mom has shaped me in every single way, and I honestly don't think I would be the person I am today without her guidance. I trust in and rely on my mom's opinion more than any other individual's, and simply cannot make a decision without her advice. My mother is wise, perceptive, and incredibly selfless. I know she loves me because of her unfailing kindness and continual sacrifice. Since the day I was born she has lost countless nights of sleep just to help me deal with my emotional, tempestuous self. We stay up hours and hours talking, gossiping, and figuring out my life. She has taught me to explore my world, dream of limitless possibilities, and embrace my inner feminist. I admire my mother because she continually sacrifices her time for others. She is always willing to listen to people, and people long to listen to her. She is kind, she is intelligent, she is hilarious, she is profoundly spiritual, she is beautiful. She is my mother. 

• I asked her:

  
  

  What do you admire about yourself?

  I like that I keep going, even after failures, and don't give up on my goals.
  
  

  What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?

  I'm proud that my grown children are such smart and interesting adults and that they genuinely love each other.

  
  

  What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?

  That I love people and want to understand them.
  
  

  What makes you feel beautiful?

  Good health and vitality.
  What do you consider “beauty” to be?
  Emotional warmth and openness.
  
  

  How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals?
  By listening to them. By trying to mirror back the beauty that I see in them.

  
  How can girls recognize their divine and spiritual natures in a world bent on warping the significance of personal female identity through negative beauty ideals?

  
  

  • They need to have self discipline and follow their  lights without fear. Then they will discover their inner powers and be able to use them to bless the lives of others.
    
    
    
    
    

Julie

Meet my Aunt Julie. Words cannot describe how much I love this woman. She has been a central figure in my life since the day I was born, and I honestly don't know who I would be without her. Julie has always looked out for me and has taught me so much about life and understanding the difficulties of this world. Because of Julie I have developed an increased sensitivity for the feelings of others, which is something that has become invaluable in my life. What I admire about Julie is her profound devotion to her daughter Jessica, who I absolutely adore. I see the incredible person my cousin Jessica has become and hope I can be even half as good of a parent as my aunt. Julie is brilliant, accomplished, insightful, hilarious, and incredibly intuitive. I have been truly blessed to have her as an influence in my life.

I asked Julie: 

What do you admire about yourself?

My intuition for parenting Jessica. Even while I was pregnant with Jessica, my intuition regarding her needs and well being was stronger than I ever anticipated. I have learned to trust that intution and let it guide me.

What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?
Raising a wonderful daughter--of course that's mostly her. 

What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?
My life, my feelings, my experiences are real and valid. 

What makes you feel beautiful?
Loving. I know it sounds cliche. But it's true. 

What do you consider “beauty” to be?
Our capacity to love. And our capacity to embrace life.

How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals? 

Love themselves and others. See the value in each person. Their ideas, their accomplishments, their vulnerabilities and embrace them. Try not to act from a place of fear. Fear should alert us to danger, but it should not be the place from which we make decisions. 

The crucible of love is where we start to ask the big spiritual questions, and ultimately where they end.

This [Love] is where we create our lives, this is where we find meaning, this is where our purpose becomes clear. 

--Kerry Egan

Janece

Meet Janece. Before Janece had become a part of our family, I don't think I had ever experienced such a magnitude of warmth and kindness from an individual. Janece has been very supportive and has shown an interest in my life, which is very meaningful to me. Janece has never failed to amaze me with the projects she undertakes, like learning hypnotherapy. Seriously, too cool. I am truly inspired by the dedication and hard work she has put into her career as a massage therapist. She is a woman of many talents, and has been a great example to me in my formative years as an adolescent. I know Janece cares deeply for others and wants them to be happy, simply by the way she smiles. It has been a great blessing to have her in my life these past few years, and I feel honored to know her. 


I asked Janece:

What do you admire about yourself?  
I am kind and compassionate toward other living things, be they plants, bugs, animals, or people.  I like to smile at others, even when I don't know them.  It's the best when they smile back in spite of themselves.  I try to understand where people are coming from, see all sides, even if they stand on a different side of the matter than I do.

What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?  
There are many things, but I'll try to rein in my answer! 1) I have transformed my belief that I wasn't smart to a belief that I am very intelligent.  I truly appreciate the things I think about and the way I express myself now.  2) I have run my own business for almost twenty years, bringing healing and happiness to the lives of others.  3)  I have rescued many animals, caring for some of them for a few hours until I found their lost family, and some for a lifetime, as I became their trusted family.  4) I have allowed myself to discover who I am and want to be, and showed the Truth of me to the world around me, even when it is hard or scary. 

What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you? 
That I am honest. I act with intention and integrity as much and as often as I possibly can.

What makes you feel beautiful? 
On my own, my own smile makes me feel beautiful.  When with others, having someone smile back, or listen to what I'm saying makes me feel beautiful.  Oh, and dancing.
What do you consider “beauty” to be?
Beauty is found in how a person expresses, or conducts, themselves.    It is seen in how kind or thoughtful a person is, how s/he listens, touches, laughs, interacts.  A person who may seem beautiful in appearance may become less and less so as they reveal what is unkind or disingenuous about them. A person who may not at first seem physically striking often becomes more and more gloriously beautiful as their depths are revealed.  Beauty is found in the anticipation of getting to know the details of a person, and in the discovery of those details.  Beauty is Connection. 

How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals? 
Because I own a massage and wellness center, I interact with people every day in a space that may be vulnerable for them.  They allow me to see what they may usually make efforts to hide.  It is my honor to create a safe place for each person who comes to me.  When I hear a woman ridicule her body (and women of ALL shapes and sizes do this, even the most perfectly formed ones) I try to help her see herself with new eyes.  I explain that it is healthy and beautiful to have curves.  That we weren't meant to look like skeletons.  I help her to see at least one aspect of herself that she can start to appreciate immediately, such as her eyes, her smile, her wit, her skin, her laughter, etc.  Often, I talk about the media and how it leads us to identify certain things as "normal" or "desirable" when they aren't in fact normal or appropriate at all.  Finally, I like to draw people's thoughts toward beauty.  I ask "Name one thing about the world or life that you love, and one thing you would like to see change."  I am often in awe of the wonderful things people come up with.  And when we focus on good and positive, we feel good and positive. 

Lauren

Meet my cousin Lauren. I can honestly say that she is my very best friend in the world. Whether she likes it or not, we will always be together, and that is truly a blessing in my life. Lauren magnetizes others to her. She is bright, openminded, intelligent, and absolutely hilarious. Although she comes into my house in spandex and eats all of my otter pops, makes me tie her pointe shoes, and steals the food right off of my plate, I will always love her. What I admire about Lauren is her ability to communicate her love for others. She is genuinely interested in people's lives, and is never judgmental. Lauren is the first person I go to when I have something I am struggling to cope with. She has never failed to give the best advice, and is always willing to help people in need. She is profoundly spiritual and is a strengthening influence to the people she associates with. She is always willing to expand her mind and takes her education very seriously. I am proud to be related to this girl. Very proud. 

I asked her: 

What do you admire about yourself?

I admire my relationship with the Savior and my love for people. I love that I have a desire to learn and be educated. I am secure with who I am and who I am becoming.

What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?

If I had to pinpoint something specific it would have to be my recent experience with my roommate and introducing her to the gospel. When people doubted her faith and desire to get baptized, I ignored them. I stayed strong and continued to push her through missionary discussions and conversations about the church. It was uncomfortable, at times, but I stayed true to what I believe and I know that the Lord paved the way for the Spirit to work through me and influence her. As we moved forward it became easier and more rewarding. It was a lot of work and required many specific prayers and positive energy that I didn’t realize I was capable of; however, the outcome was well worth it. She was baptized last week and is full of light. Through the whole process my testimony was strengthened immensely. I came to know my Heavenly Father more than ever before and learned to recognize the spirit in perfect form. This was an accomplishment in my life that I am truly proud of, not only for my dear friend's sake, but for mine as well.

What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?

I would like the world to know that I am trying my best and have good intentions. I want to be a force for good in the world. If people knew that about me I think my opportunities would be endless.

What makes you feel beautiful?

I feel beautiful when I am taking care of myself or when I’ve worked hard for something and am acknowledged for it. I feel most beautiful when I feel that I’ve impacted someone's life in a positive way or when I surround myself with positive people. Feeling secure with where I am in life is beautiful to me.

What do you consider “beauty” to be?

I think that beauty is an idea. Each of us has our own idea of what it is. My idea of beauty is genuine happiness. Real beauty is achieved through spirit, attitude, and actions.

How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals?

I try to uplift most girls/women that I come across whether they are insecure or confident. Every girl, young or old needs to be told they are beautiful. It’s a part of our nature as human beings; if we hear something enough, we begin to believe it. I try and steer away from the superficial compliments and make an effort to point out the mental and spiritual aspects I admire about someone.

How can girls recognize their divine and spiritual natures in a world bent on warping the significance of personal female identity through negative beauty ideals?

My suggestion would be to make it a priority to surround oneself with young women that are striving for the same spiritual goals. I know in my life, the women that I have chosen to spend the majority of my time with has impacted my recognition of who I am and my female identity. Friends reflect who you are. Along with that, I steer clear of superficial magazines, movies or T.V. ads that create shallow standards of beauty and female identity. When I am exposed to them I try to see them for what they are and not internalize their message.

Ellie

Meet my friend Ellie. I have been incredibly blessed in my life because of this one individual. I feel as if Ellie and I have connected from day one. She may not remember the first time we met, but I honestly couldn't believe there could be someone in this world that was so cool.  What I love about Ellie is that she is in touch with herself, takes pride in who she is, and is not ashamed of it. Ellie is incredibly down to earth and is insanely easy to get along with. We can and do talk well into the night/morning when we get together. Ellie has a profound awareness of and sensitivity to the world around her. Whether it is in regard to her cultural and societal awareness or her extraordinary artistic abilities, she has an amazing perspective and intuition about her surroundings. What I admire about Ellie is her loyalty to others as well as the love she has for the people in her life. She is always willing to share her experiences and share what she loves with the world. I honestly don't know what I would do without her. 

I asked her:

What do you admire about yourself?
I admire my ability to reach out to others and make friends easily. I admire my independence and self-confidence. 

What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?
I wanted to be visual art sterling scholar since I knew what it was and my senior year I became that. I am still really proud of that. I have never let stupid things hold me back from going for things I want and I'm proud of that too. 

What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?
I would want the world to know that, despite my crazy antics I am actually a really deep, passionate person. I would want the world to see me the way I see me. 


What do you consider “beauty” to be?
Physical labor. Ha ha! Really though... using my body (God's greatest creations) to accomplish things... create things. Like building houses or planting trees and digging up rocks. Hiking a mountain. Even though I am sweaty and gross and not looking my best at all when these things happen, pushing my physical body to its limits makes me feel really beautiful. 


What makes you feel beautiful?
Attitude. Beauty is all about the way you carry yourself and how you treat other people. Act beautiful and you will feel beautiful. People will see your beauty. Smile.  

How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals?

The world's ideas of beauty are ridiculous. The world sees "trends." Think about the terrible trends that happen in fashion for instance. 90's mom jeans and belly shirts, or right now neon is really popular but it won't always be so. Stick to what is classic. In fashion and life! Manners and good hygiene will always be in style. Take care of yourself and the world can go screw itself. 

How can girls recognize their divine and spiritual natures in a world bent on warping the significance of personal female identity through negative beauty ideals?

Womanhood is a very powerful thing. The gift of being a woman is a blessing and a curse for a lot of reasons. Women are just always meant to be tested and pushed. Pray to Heavenly father to help you see and cultivate your spiritual gifts. God creates so many beautiful things in nature. He is the true artist of the universe. He doesn't make mistakes and He also blessed us with agency. Our own ability to choose what we do with our lives. God wants us to be happy and that can be done in a manner of ways. Respect yourself and God will appreciate it. 

Sue Ann

Meet my Aunt Sue Ann. In my life, Sue Ann has been someone who has made me feel truly beautiful. She gives the sincerest, most enthusiastic compliments and pays attention to details about others that sometimes go unnoticed. She is incredibly upbeat and brightens up the room when she walks in. What I love about my Aunt Sue is her openness to life and experience. I desperately wish I had the same connectivity with the world that she possesses. She has accomplished so much in her life, shows compassion for others, and has raised the best family. She is an amazing example to me and has always made me feel good about myself. I have definitely been blessed to know such a strong woman!

I asked Sue:

What do you admire about yourself? 
My ability to judge a situation fairly and with compassion.


What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?
Without a doubt, the happiness, confidence, verbal and thinking skills of my three sons.


What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?
I would want the world to know, that I am funny.


What makes you feel beautiful?
Fitness.


What do you consider “beauty” to be? 
Smiles and confidence.


How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals?
Actually, I would suggest to them, to not look past the world’s beauty ideals because they will always be there. Rather, look and assess. Then get to know yourself well enough to appreciate what you bring to the table now and what you can improve upon at that moment. (add your twist, your signature) When looking at the world’s beauty ideals see if they resonate with you. If you love the beauty, enjoy it. If you do not, dismiss it. Realizing that someone, but not everyone has established that beauty as their ideal, it may or may not be yours…but for heaven’s sake seek to find your beauty inside and outside. Know that it is there…always. Your job as a women is to find it.


How can girls recognize their divine and spiritual natures in a world bent on warping the significance of personal female identity through negative beauty ideals?
Question. Are they always negative beauty ideals? Or are they part of the entertainment? Distinguishing between what a genuine person is and what an advertisement is, is crucial in anyone’s self esteem and personal development. Do you want to sell something? And/Or do you want to be a real and authentic women who makes and touches the lives of others or makes a difference when she enters a family, a room, a meeting, etc. Having the WOW factor has a lot to do with someone’s attention and focus. Is it all on themselves? Or is it an authentic interest in others that are within their reach? A spiritual person is present in the moment and very aware of what is happening around them, along with the reactions of another to her or to anything else going on. A woman can impact most situations by getting outside herself and seeing the beauty in others and around her…. and that is truly beautiful and always welcome.

Cynthia

Meet my Aunt Cindy. Cindy has been like a second mom to me. She has loved me, disciplined me (sparingly, of course), and made me feel like one of the funniest people on the planet. Thanks, Cindy, for laughing at my jokes. Even when they weren't funny. If I could spend the entire day with my Aunt Cindy, I would. She has been so encouraging throughout my life, and has taught me how to have a good time. I love when she whips her hair back and forth, I love when we have giggle fits together, and I love that she loves me more than her own daughters. It's okay for me to say that, because my own mother will often make the same claims. ;) One of the things I love about Cindy is her incredible optimism. I know life has not been easy for her, but she works incredibly hard and always seems to remain upbeat through life's challenges. Cindy has been an incredible example to me, and one of my greatest desires is for everyone to know how amazing she is.

I asked Cindy:

What do you admire about yourself?
My ability to work hard, work through problems, and help others who are struggling. 

What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?
Raising a strong family

What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?
How much I love and care about individuals

What makes you feel beautiful?
Knowing I have affected someone's life for the better 

What do you consider “beauty” to be?
Personality and intelligence

How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals?
When it comes up, I do a lot of talkin'

How can girls recognize their divine and spiritual natures in a world bent on warping the significance of personal female identity through negative beauty ideals?
Turn off the TV, get involved in projects that are bigger than themselves, develop a strong relationship with their Heavenly Father and keep the Spirit in their lives

Taralyn

Meet Taralyn, my roommate and one of my very best friends. I have known Tara since my sophomore year of high school, and I can honestly say that she is one of the most compassionate people I have ever met. She has been a loyal friend through very formative years of my life. What I admire about Tara is that she is nonjudgmental and incredibly openminded. She is perfectly happy to have conversations with me about virtually anything, and let's be honest... I am definitely one to bring up bizarre and potentially awkward topics for conversation. I love Tara because she shows profound concern for the welfare of others, and sacrifices so much of her time to make people happy. 

I asked Tara:

What do you admire about yourself?

My ability to laugh and just have fun with everything. 

What have you accomplished in your life that you are proud of?

Success in ballroom, finishing high school, becoming an MA

What is the one thing you would want the world to know about you?
That I am just me. I don't need the ideas or concepts of anyone else to be happy with myself and who I am. 

What makes you feel beautiful?

Simply being happy

What do you consider “beauty” to be?
Someone who just naturally shines, stands out, is happy and kind to everyone

How do you encourage other girls/women to look past the world’s beauty ideals?

Helping make them feel more confident, assuring them of their true beauty and the fact that they don't need to meet the world's standard of "beauty"

How can girls recognize their divine and spiritual natures in a world bent on warping the significance of personal female identity through negative beauty ideals?

Focusing on more than just their looks. Enjoying school, activities, their religious beliefs, family and friends. Surrounding themselves with positive influences that don't focus on the idea of world beauty.

Inspiration

Before I start posting on this blog I should probably explain the inspiration behind it. It all started in my Book of Mormon class at Brigham Young University when I came across a chapter about the vanity of the daughters of Zion (2 Nephi 13).  The first time I read these verses I didn’t carefully consider what might be meant in the copious description of the ornaments and vanity of the women Isaiah describes. I merely thought, “Well, this is typical. Women are being mentioned in the scriptures and, as per usual, they’re up to something sinful and should be admonished.” Although I may never get over the androcentrism I find in the scriptures, I carefully considered why this might have been mentioned. Vanity is truly a devastating force for women. It is completely destructive to the way we perceive women and their worth, as well as what each woman can contribute. In our present day exposure to the media, women are often portrayed the way the “daughters of Zion” are described. Our exposure to the media encourages a female ideal that revolves around vanity and physical appearance, as well as a very oppressive and sexualized representation of female worth. My goal behind this blog is to present this dilemma to the public and combat the objectification of women in the media by portraying the accomplishments of the women I admire, looking beyond appearances and valuing the profound worth of their identities. In my own way, I hope to take a small part in dismantling the negative depiction of the female gender. So here I am, presenting the women I love to the world. They are beautiful, they are capable, they are powerful, they are real. They have shaped me in ways the world cannot, and I hope you can see them in the same light I do.